The Art of Sex Talk

Let’s talk about sex.

Talking about sex isn’t easy at first. It takes some communication with your partner. Finding the right terms can be weird. It may feel crude when you say “cunt,” “pussy,” “tits,” “cock.”

If you try cleaning up your act you may sound like a wannabe Kingsman. Saying “vagina,” “clitoris,” “breasts,” “penis” isn’t sexy and it might not open up legs for you.

Sex is supposed to be fun and sex talk dirty without being vulgar. The good news is that women don’t even know what to call their own genitals. Many women haven’t found words they are comfortable with yet, and that’s often because they are not comfortable with their genitals.

You may have to work with each sexual partner you have to find words that work for both of you. Or if you can find some sweet terms without offending them then you’re in luck.

Sexual language can be charged.

Just hearing sexual ideas can bring up shame, guilt, or make us feel dirty. It can also excite us and help us get in touch with our sexuality and our bodies.

Sexuality is conflicted and words can make us feel guilty. Most sex words are considered “dirty words” or they carry negative connotations. Sex words, especially those associated with our bodies and sexual acts, are normally used as insults. Let’s be abnormal and use them in a positive way.

There is a strange irony in our using as insults words that give us so much pleasure. In a non sexual context being called a “pussy” or a “dick” or an “asshole” isn’t nice. Neither do the phrases “fuck you” or “cocksucker” or “Suck my dick” bring much pleasure if its not an invitation to sex. Because this language is so negatively charged, it’s hard to participate in the acts they describe with pure joy and pride.

Your goal is to get laid and its better when wet.

Remember to listen more and watch your tongue. Each time you’re with a new lover you have to create a new language. You have to find a way to talk about love and sex that opens you up and excites you both.

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